Marco Island Police Hunt Bold Thief Who Made Off With… a “Closed” Sign

Marco Island, Fla. — Forget high-stakes jewel heists and bank robberies — on Marco Island, the criminal underworld has apparently set its sights on… plastic store signage.

Marco Island Police are investigating the theft of an expandable “closed” sign valued at about $400 after someone was caught on surveillance video swiping it from outside the Bargain Basket Store on August 30.

The footage shows the suspect carefully loading the hefty piece of retail décor into the back of what appears to be a Lexus SUV before making a clean getaway. Police haven’t confirmed whether the vehicle sped off into the sunset or simply merged politely into Bald Eagle Drive traffic.

Store volunteers say the missing sign was more than just plastic — it was a hardworking member of the team, letting shoppers know when the doors were shut. Now, they’re left improvising. “We’ve had to use a handwritten note taped to the door,” one staffer sighed. “It just doesn’t have the same gravitas.”

Authorities are reminding the public that while the case may sound unusual, theft is no laughing matter. Anyone with information is urged to contact Marco Island Police at (239) 389-3942.

In the meantime, locals can only hope the sign is being put to good use, perhaps guarding the thief’s driveway or serving as a very fancy piece of garage décor.