📰 Naples’ Gone Wild: Ex-Property Manager Turned Alleged Million-Dollar Con Artist Found Living His Best (Prison) Life in Colombia 🇨🇴💸

By Your Favorite Over-Caffeinated Florida Journalist ☕🕶️

Well, well, well — looks like the Sunshine State’s most “creative accountant” has finally traded in his Palm trees for prison bars. 🌴➡️🚔

Orlando Miserandino Ortiz, 55, the formerly fabulous Naples property manager who allegedly siphoned millions from Southwest Florida condo associations, has reportedly been captured in Colombia and is now enjoying the amenities of La Picota prison in Bogotá — a five-star resort famous for its lack of Wi-Fi, air conditioning, and mercy. 🏝️➡️⛓️

Meanwhile, his wife and business partner Lina Posada has apparently pulled a Houdini, vanishing faster than an HOA’s landscaping budget. ✨💨

💰 From HOA Fees to High Crimes

Ortiz, once known for his jet-setting lifestyle, private jets ✈️, and Medellín mansion 🏠, is now facing extradition to the U.S. — where his new suite may come with complimentary orange jumpsuits and a roommate named Bubba.

Court records in Collier County show nearly three dozen condo associations sued Ortiz’s company, American Property Management Services, back in 2022. The accusations? Oh, nothing major — just embezzling millions, falsifying records, and ghosting entire neighborhoods.

Residents reportedly couldn’t pay their bills, insurance lapsed, and utilities nearly got shut off. Because apparently, when Ortiz promised “full service management,” he meant servicing his own accounts at Wells Fargo. 🏦💳

⚖️ The Legal Drama: “Faith Restored,” Says One Lawyer, Probably While Crying into His Latte

Naples attorney Jason Hamilton Mikes, representing the wronged condo associations, said:

“If someone cheats our established systems and institutions, they must be brought to justice.”

Translation: Please stop stealing HOA money. We’re trying to keep the pool open and the grass cut. 🌾💦

Mikes went on to say he was “thankful” Ortiz had been apprehended — though given the $70 million estimated fraud, the gratitude probably comes with a side of cautious optimism and a stiff drink. 🍸

🕵️‍♂️ Where Did It All Go Wrong?

Let’s recap the alleged plot twist:

• Ortiz managed condo funds.

• Moved them into his accounts.

• Disappeared like a Florida snowbird after Easter.

• Turned up in Colombia, where the luxury views now come with iron bars and an extradition order.

American Express also joined the party 🎉 in 2022, suing Ortiz for a modest $300,000 business card tab. Because when you’re living large off HOA fees, why not max out the Platinum card too?

🚨 The Grand Finale: The 17-Count Curtain Call

In January 2024, a federal grand jury slapped Ortiz and Posada with a 17-count indictment including wire fraud, money laundering, and failure to file income taxes — because, let’s face it, even the IRS wants a piece of this saga. 🧾💀

Now, Ortiz waits in Colombia, possibly reminiscing about his days sipping cortados in Medellín — except now he’s doing it from a metal cup, with a guard watching. ☕🔒

🐊 Florida’s Moral of the Story

Only in Florida could someone go from managing condos to managing criminal charges across international borders. 🌎💼

As Naples residents breathe a sigh of relief and HOAs cautiously check their bank accounts, one lesson rings true:

Always read the fine print. Especially when your property manager owns a jet. ✈️💀

🗞️ Developing story: Lina Posada remains at large. Authorities suggest she may be somewhere sunny, sipping a margarita, and pretending to be “Linda Posado.” Stay tuned. 🍹👒